It’s Okay to Go Solo!

Traveling is a rewarding experience.

Deciding where to go and what to do is of the utmost importance in whether or not you will get what you want out of that experience.  Deciding whether to travel alone or with a partner or group is an even bigger task.

While in Koh Samui, Thailand, a young gentleman from Switzerland, introduced himself to me one evening.  Alex and I began a conversation that led me to find that he was traveling alone…until April.  I was so curious, as to what his travel plans were for the coming months and what he had already experienced, that we talked for almost two hours.  Although this year,  I had made the decision to travel with others, I suddenly found that I was very excited for Alex but actually also a little jealous.

Last year, after my initial travel arrangements had fallen through, I decided to proceed with my plan to visit Thailand anyway…alone.  Nervous as I was to travel halfway around the world by myself, I pushed forward and found that the experience of traveling by oneself is actually quite different than I expected. Certainly, on layovers, I’ve taken the train to other cities and wandered by myself, knowing that my crew members or my employing airline was a phone call away if I ever needed help.  That knowledge gives one a great feeling of security.  Here, I knew no one.  Well, almost no one…

Amazingly, October seems to be a popular month for flight attendants to travel to Thailand.  While in the Narita airport, I ran into two of my friends who were also traveling to Bangkok. Plans were made to keep in touch and to get together for dinner or sightseeing.  Another flight attendant and a friend were traveling on the same flight, but traveling to the south of Thailand.  We were able to meet up one night in Koh Phi Phi, a week later.

After a couple of days of settling in, though, what I found that I loved (more than the elaborate temples, more than the delicious food, more than the Chang Beer) was that each morning, I made the decisions…what time I would wake each morning, what to eat for breakfast, where to go, what to see, how long I stayed.  I could meet up with friends…or not.  What I enjoyed most, though, was that my itinerary was open.  If I wanted to go somewhere else, booking a last minute plane, train or bus ticket, was easy.  And that’s just what I did.

After five nights in Bangkok, I decided that I wanted to head south.  Booking a ticket the night before, I headed to the airport and boarded a flight to Phuket. Knowing virtually nothing about the area, I headed to the ferry terminal, booked a hotel while en route to Koh Phi Phi and arrived an hour and a half later.  Deciding to stay for three days, I then bought a ferry ticket back to Phuket and spent a couple of days in the Patong Beach area, before heading back to Bangkok.

What I remember most about traveling to these places was the spontaneity of it all.  It was such an adventure and I had no preconceived notion of what to expect or what I was going to do.  Walking along the beach one day, I instantaneously decided to hire a longtail boat for a snorkeling adventure.  Later, on another walk, I signed up to go diving the next day.  Another evening, I decided to have dinner with a group of divers that I met.  Getting to my room in Phuket and spotting a flyer, I marched downstairs to the front desk immediately and booked a tour which included elephant trekking, whitewater rafting, ziplining, waterfall hiking and a visit to a monkey temple.  The group of fun-loving Australians that I met on this tour insisted that they be my dinner companions that evening…and I obliged!

The exuberance that I felt after my trip was over was indescribable!  Wanting to recreate it, I almost immediately began to research a trip for the following year.  Deciding that since I had visited the Andaman Sea on this trip, I was going to venture over to the Gulf of Thailand and check out the islands there.  Another thing I wanted to do was to hop over to Cambodia.  Visiting Angkor Wat had been a dream of mine for a very long time.

Hearing of my plans, many of my friends, expressed interested in traveling with me, however, I plodded forward and decided to leave things open for the time being.  A few months prior to my departure, I decided to ask a friend that I’ve known for many years, to travel with me.  Slowly, I began thinking of what my general itinerary would be.  Again, I wanted to leave things open and book tickets at the last minute, and I decided that two people should still be able to make last minute plans as there were many options for travel and only one room was required.   Cambodia would still take a bit of planning since visas were required and tour guides would need to be hired.  So, I decided Cambodia would be on the program first and then the relaxing beach vacation for the second half.

About a month prior to departure, I received a text from my friend asking if I minded that another flight attendant travel with us.  Even though I knew that it would present a few problems with the hotels and travel, I agreed.  The more the merrier, right?  I soon realized that since we were arriving in Thailand on a major holiday weekend, getting three people both around the country and out of the country was going to take airline reservations made in advance.  Additionally, hotel reservations were going to have to be made prior because of the holiday and because some hotels do not have triple rooms nor do some allow three people in a room.

Embarking on the many plans that now had to be made was a monumental task.  I had to research flights for Cambodia and within Thailand.  I had to research hotels, spending countless hours trying to find places that were convenient to dining and shopping and other activities and that would accept three people within a room or that had triple rooms.  My “easy going” vacation was no more.  My plan, to island hop from Koh Tao to Koh Samui, was shot down, as I was told that it would be easier if we didn’t have to keep unpacking and repacking.  Due to airline reservations, Cambodia would have to be at the end of our vacation.  And, because I had been there before and knew so many people who had traveled to this region, I had the knowledge and the contacts to get information required to make the arrangements…I, halfheartedly, became the tour guide.

After much groundwork, a strict itinerary was finally in place.  An itinerary that included taking a ferry at five o’clock in the morning in order to make a flight from Surat Thani to Cambodia.   An itinerary that now included two hotel rooms because hotels that accommodated three people and had the amenities that we wanted, were few and far between. Adding a bed, to a room meant for two, was almost as much as an additional room, not to mention the crowding factor. Because I had done all of the planning, it was very stressful for me, as I knew that all of the stars were having to line up in order for us to be where we needed to be, when we needed to be there.  Please, I prayed, let there be no bad weather to upset the ferry schedule!

Although I missed the adventurous, easygoing aspect of traveling alone, there were good parts of this trip, as well.  One benefit was the safety factor.  There is always safety in numbers and someone else to count on if illness sets in. Another, is that there are activities that are more enjoyable, knowing from the beginning, that you will have companions to share it with.  Overall, I enjoyed myself, but there was a great deal that I learned on this trip that I will take into consideration in the future.

Here are some questions to ask and suggestions you should ponder when deciding to travel with others:

First, how well do you know the other people traveling with you?  When spending a few weeks with other people, you will learn a lot about them, if you didn’t know them well enough beforehand.  Some things you will like and some things you won’t.  Lots of patience is required.

For how long are you traveling? Spending a few days or one week with someone is very different than two or three.

Be sure that all know each other’s expectations of the trip. Does everyone want to do the same kinds of activities?   Will everyone share the responsibility of making reservations for activities once at the destination?  Is everyone okay with splitting up at times to do their own thing?

Don’t compromise your plans.  If you want to go island hopping…go.  Make sure that everyone is aware of the plan from the beginning, but, by all means, if that means taking a side trip by yourself for a few days, do it.

How will you keep in touch with each other when not together? Does the country you are visiting sell sim cards for your phone and do you have a phone that will work with that country’s sim cards and plans?  Don’t count on being together and sharing one phone.  Even though you think you won’t use the sim card and plan, buy it.

Be mindful of each other’s time.  When out touring together, make sure that you are not off shopping when others are waiting for you with the tour guide to continue on.  Keep each other posted of your whereabouts, arrivals and departures, when not together.  Check your phone occasionally.

Next, when booking airline reservations, unless you are traveling with family members, everyone should book their own reservation.  For the sake of convenience, all of us were booked on the same reservation, on all legs of this trip.  It later dawned on me that if the person who had booked the tickets was unable to travel for any reason, the others would not be able to travel as well, as the credit card holder had to be present with valid id and the credit card used for booking. Additionally, when check in was required, this fell to the person who booked the reservation.  Having to fill in information that had to be collected for the other travelers (passport information, addresses, phone numbers) takes a great deal more time than if each traveler had done it themselves.

Additionally, things won’t always go as planned. Have Plan B and Plan C…and even Plan D, readily available.

Lastly, involve everyone in the planning of the trip.  Just because someone says, “Whatever you decide is fine with me”, doesn’t mean that they really think that.  Having someone else research the area, whether for hotels, activities and dining options.  Have others participate in making the airline, hotel and tour reservations.  He or she will be less critical of the outcome if things were not exactly as expected and may be less likely to express their displeasure, saving hurt feelings in the end.

As for my future travel plans, I most definitely think I will travel with other people again, outside of my family, for this type and length of a trip.  Although not entirely what I expected, there were good times and good memories.

However…that being said…if I am given the opportunity to travel solo again…I will take it! There is nothing like being at the helm of your adventure and sometimes throwing caution to the wind. You’ll find that you never know what you might encounter!

Thailand, October 2014

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Thailand 1994

Thailand and Cambodia, October 2015

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